ALWAYS BE THINKING ABOUT THESE THINGS

I find an interesting read on "Always be thinking about these things". Makes me wander.

I've just got a call from Penang, suddenly. About the damned event that had happened during Raya eve. Well, suffice to say..I am damned, pissed and tensed and feel like I have no one I can confide to. It's highly likely I have to pay for the damage done and pricey too. I don't have it, seriously. Now, I really hate my day. I cannot say life, as I would've lied.

So, let's go through what to think:

Dreams. Yes, with that un-interesting event..I might have to postpone my dreams. Heck, I have lots of it. It would be suck. :( But I have make a list about it. Hip hip hooray for that.

Living. Hmm..I'm living life but I feel a bit like loser now.

Influences. Many, I'll think later.

Relationships (near and far). Because relationships are central to everything else. Is there a phone call you need to make? What can you do to help someone, or at least show them you care? <-- What can I do to help me? I'm super annoying.

Passion. Because life is short, you might as well spend it doing things you’re excited about. It’s only an overused word because most people don’t know what it is. <-- I cannot chose one, pathetic.

Destinations. Because you need to know where are you going, whether it’s a real destination or a representative one. (If you don’t know where you’re going, you’ll probably end up somewhere else.) <-- I dont know where I'll end up, really.

Deliverables. Because producing something worthwhile leads to a meaningful life. Every day you can wake up and think, what’s next? It’s often easier to focus on deliverables than a time schedule that may vary depending on what else is going on. <-- I have a list now.

Growth. Because it’s not about growth for the sake of itself, but if you have something good and you can build it further without losing anything, why not grow? <-- maybe, I just dont want to grow up :(

Metrics. Because you need a way to measure your journey. <-- hmm, later maybe?

Legacy. Because this is the most important thing! What are you building? What is the story of your life, and what will be its ultimate impact on the world? <-- I still working on it. :(

I hate this feelings.

It's my birthday...

and what I got is the news that my beloved Brad has died, 4 days after, 2 days ago. It was the worst present ever, thank you.

Devastated, I was. Still do, I am.

So, I don't know how to celebrate my birthday.

Do you?

glee's finale perfect ending~

to end it with this are just wonderful~ makes me wishing upon stars. and judy garland, oh was she just fabulous? i'm so watching wizard of oz~

---

Somewhere over the rainbow

Way up high,

There's a land that I heard of

Once in a lullaby.

Somewhere over the rainbow

Skies are blue,

And the dreams that you dare to dream

Really do come true.

Someday I'll wish

upon a star

And wake up where the clouds are far

Behind me.

Where troubles melt like lemon drops

Away above the chimney tops

That's where you'll find me.

Somewhere over the rainbow

Bluebirds fly.

Birds fly over the rainbow.

Why then, oh why can't I?

If happy little bluebirds fly

Beyond the rainbow

Why, oh why can't I?

well, it's gleeks time..ok la tu! haha

you are...my hero?

via le love

Obsessive Consumption: What Did You Buy Today?

1901's at 19th May 2010 with bff, her treat~! Thanks beb~!

And here I'd like to thank bff for her approval and her superpower to make my WANT a reality. :)

OK, enough shopping. Time for house cleaning, pronto! I vowed by this weekend my part of the house would be cleaned and organized. Yes for better house and living~!

Always~

Bon Jovi's Always is currently haunting my head now~ "Now I can't sing a love song like the way it's meant to be. Well, I guess I'm not that good anymore but baby, that's just me..~"

There's someone I'm missing now, terribly. I don't know what to do. I feel somewhat gummy all inside. It is as though nothing is ever right for the time being. Hmm.. I have nothing good to say, I should leave it at that! argh, still..a miss is a miss. darn~!

On other news, my Coastal Scents's 78 piece makeup palette has arrived~! That was super fast! Now, bffs and me can go all crazy with all the colors on the palette. Talk about girls and makeups~! haha.

click here for details

4th may 2010.

oh gosh, what happen to me? one post a month? so depressing..hahaha..or is it life offline is better than online..ahaks..i wish la kan~!

anyway..i'm just happy :)

happy birthday~!!!

i heart you forever and always~!

pic from here

placeboRocks~!

last nite was a blast, i love it! placebo has done well with their 20 songs old and new in 90minutes performance! abg brian mmg sgt mantap dgn suara yg sgt baik! the sounds is very authentic, not too loud..overall, i love la~! maybe some of the discography, i didnt manage to catch it up~! but more than 50% i know of~! not bad for a one day extensive learning~! haha

the songlist~

it was hard :(

after a long hesitation, i did it! :( and now, i'm feeling like parts of me have vanished. no, lost.
devastated, i am..tapi hidup mesti terus! lets make new memories, keep the past lost or maybe locked somewhere in between. here's to new life of mi corazón!

untuk kita!

Menarilah dan terus tertawa
walau dunia tak seindah surga
Bersyukurlah pada yang Kuasa
Cinta kita di dunia
selamanya..

Cinta kepada hidup
memberikan senyuman abadi
walau hidup kadang tak adil
tapi cinta lengkapi kita.

dont leave me.

Ne me quitte pas
Il faut oublier
Tout peut s'oublier
Qui s'enfuit déjà
Oublier le temps
Des malentendus
Et le temps perdu
A savoir comment
Oublier ces heures
Qui tuaient parfois
A coups de pourquoi
Le coeur du bonheur

posting this in tears, for missing KakMin..for whatever happen on Saturday, Sunday..today. for hommie, for myself..i am scared.

from le love.

thanks for sharing

Fade Kitchen Bowls

I should buy myself a house, so I can keep all the things that I like and I want and use them! uhuhu

Nice Fade bowls which is uberCool! via swissmiss

this polaroid was taken on my birthday..

somewhere else away from home. I found out about late Jamie Livington through Zana while she was looking for Polaroid filmpacks (not that I know why..hehe)

it's amazing to see how life captured everyday in Polaroid film and in a way, make us wonder about death..well live and let live before death come and take you away.

Bermimpilah, maka Tuhan akan memeluk mimpi-mimpimu

saya mahu tonton ini... kerana sejak akhir2 ni, teringat sungai lenggang. :)

The Nuffnang Footprints!!

wow, just found out beloved Nuffnang have a wall, click here for more info. bff, jom snail mail photo!! hehe..

hey, fellow nuffnangers! here is one info you dont want to miss..the address for the snail mail!!

The Nuffnang Footprints Guardian
Nuffnang Sdn Bhd
12B-5 & 12B-6, Heritage House,
33 Jalan Yap Ah Shak,
50300 Kuala Lumpur,
Malaysia.

lama tak menggunakan perkhidmatan pos malaysia, mungkin inilah masanya. <3

i miss you. i miss you. i miss you.

<3

a heart that hurts is a heart that works.

[pix curik dr kekure..hehe..amik tau beb ;) ]

i'm savoring placebo - bright lights cause love hurts! and today's 182. i heart, no..i love it!!

Cast your mind back to the days,
When I pretend' I was OK.
I had so very much to say,
About my crazy livin'.
Now that I've stared into the void,
So many people, I've annoyed.
I have to find a middle way,
A better way of livin'.

So I haven't given up,
That all my choices, my good luck...
Appear to go and get me stuck,
In an open prison.
Now I am tryin' to break free,
In a state of empathy.
Find the true and enemy,
Eradicate this prison.

No-one can take it away from me,
And no-one can tear it apart.
'Cause a heart that hurts,
Is a heart that works.
A heart that hurts,
Is a heart that works.

A heart that hurts,
Is a heart that works.
No-one can take it away from me,
No-one can tear it apart.
Maybe ' an elaborate fantasy,
But it's the perfect place to start.

'Cause a heart that hurts,
Is a heart that works.
A heart that hurts,
Is a heart that... works.

just wow!

Site-hopping from swissmiss, and find this drawings by Marco Fusinato just fascinating and WOW; investigating if there is a connection between sound, vibrations and physical reality?

Humm, does it? they should have eh..as we human does vibrate when we move, talk even with sleeping. Vibrations lead to sound. Does it just amazing to know about it? Even amazed when the connection is drawn~! oh, i think i miss drawing..

my heart is filled with you.

bff told me that this song's reflects me..well i'd say it does reflect me..lots!!

(pix courtesy of it rightful owner, nice one!)

Colbie Caillat - You Got Me

You're stuck on me and my laughing eyes
I can't pretend though I try to hide - I like you
I like you.

I think I felt my heart skip a beat
I'm standing here and I can hardly breathe - you got me
You got me.

The way you take my hand is just so sweet
And that crooked smile of yours it knocks me off my feet

Oh, I just can't get enough
I'm a stoup[? ] I need to fill me up.
It feels so good it must be love
It's everything that I've been dreaming of.
I give up. I give in. I let go. Let's begin.
Cause no matter what I do,
Oh (oh) my heart is filled with you.

I can't imagine what it'd be like
Livin everyday in this life - without you.
Without you.
One look from you I know you understand
This mess we're in you know is just so out of hand.

Oh, I just can't get enough
I'm a stoup[? ] I need to fill me up.
It feels so good it must be love
It's everything that I've been dreaming of.
I give up. I give in. I let go. Let's begin.
Cause no matter what I do,

Oh, I just can't get enough
I'm a stoup[? ] I need to fill me up.
It feels so good it must be love
It's everything that I've been dreaming of.
I give up. I give in. I let go. Let's begin.
Cause no matter what I do,
Oh (oh) my heart is filled with you.

Oh (oh)
You got me. You got me.
Oh (oh)
You got me. You got me.

oh, gosh~!

it's been almost 3 years already..it was about 8pm something kot i called. ahaha.

huhu..ain't it something, awak?

a lovely story from a tragedy.

i've watched this last nite, with my sis :yana: i do not cry, not because it is not sad..but maybe i have enough crying lately. even watching few of csi's i tend to shed a tear. maybe, it just me being sensitive lately.

the book by alice sebold of course has deeper meaning..but, peter jackson has definitely succeded to bring this story with magical experience with a few tweaks here and there. and i definitely do not like mr harvey..

watch this if you've read the book and want to see latest addition of mr jackson. 4.5 stars from me (as grandma lynn+buckley and the rests deserves more, but how would you cramp all in a movie? hehe)

I just haven't met you yet.

I'm not surprised.
Not everything lasts.
I've broken my heart so many times I stopped keeping track.
Talk myself in.
I talk myself out.
I get all worked up, then I let myself down.

I tried so very hard not to lose it.
I came up with a million excuses.
I thought I thought of every possibility.

And I know someday that it'll all turn out.
You'll make me work so we can work to work it out.
And promise you, kid, that I'll give so much more than I get.
I just haven't met you yet.

Mmmm...

I might have to wait.
I'll never give up.
I guess it's half timing,
And the other half's luck.
Wherever you are.
Whenever it's right.
You'll come out of nowhere and into my life.

And I know that we can be so amazing.
And baby your love is gonna change me.
And now I can see every possibility.

Mmmm...

But somehow I know that it'll all turn out.
And you'll make me work so we can work to work it out.
And I promise you, kid, I'll give so much more than I get.
I just haven't met you yet.

They say all's fair.
In love and war.
But I won't need to fight it.
We'll get it right and,
We'll be united.

And I know that we can be so amazing.
And being in your life is gonna change me.
And now I can see every single possibility, mmmm.

And someday I know it'll all turn out.
And I'll work to work it out.
Promise you, kid, I'll give more than I get,
Than I get, than I get, than I get.

Ohhh!

You know it'll all turn out.
And you'll make me work so we can work to work it out.
And I promise you, kid, to give so much more than I get.
I just haven't met you yet.

I just haven't met you yet.
Ohh, promise you, kid, to give so much than I get.

(I said love, love, love, love...)
I just haven't met you yet

I just haven't met you yet.

lovely weekends with bffs.

Last weekend was the best weekend ever to spend with bffs in two separate occasions. ;) i like! first being "Digi Internet Pimp My Day" with Yatoque on Saturday and second, AJL24 with Fila on Sunday.

So, my Saturday can be considered quite a slow one, have problems waking up but have to wake up due to 9.30am appointment with bugsman to check our house. After that only, I got ready for the event of the day!!! High with hopes and full of p
ositivity that I could make myself proud..i dragged myself at the wee 1.45pm to meet up with "Barbie Army", my team. We're Team 1.. (memang sesuatu betul! haha) and sorry girls I was late, but we sure make an impression..ihiks.

Anyway, this is us, "Barbie Army"

Emy, me, Yatoque, and Fiza

First thing first, tangkap gambar group..haha..and then, we got goodie which is a broadband modem powered by Digi as our companion. (of courselah kan, the tagline is "Broadband done right") After about 45mins wait, we go in and got brief. err, didnt i tell you that the location is at Mardi Gras, and we are about to go round and round OU. i didnt eh!? but anyway..that's where we're at. hehe..anyway, the game is like we have to complete sets of challenges whereby challenging!! tak tipu! and how glad we all were, we managed to complete all but one challenges due to time limitation..:D

and now, the challenges! first, we opted for swatch challenge, where we are to create one 30 sec ad creatively with swatch and digi of course (you can check it out at fb..like i'm gonna link it here, malu seh!). the second one quite easy, pose at your best with Quiksilver clothing! check us out! i got this sweater which was sooo warm!!

then, the hardest challenge...we have to run 800m which is equivalent to 2 rounds of stadium ok! definitely have to get fit pronto~! but i managed to finish it up in less than 10mins. a record for me, but behold the consequences..ahaha.

then, we were quite loss in finding the digi store. not so cool, but anyway, we manage to find 2 separate challenges in one place, Rainforest; first being Bulls Eye (where we have to sumpit menyumpit, sorry i sucks at this) and second, dictionary @ur hand..hehe ..oklah we survive that!! than we go back to Mardi Gras, to have the most embrassing moment in life where we have to pole-dance creatively with theme, athletic. (well, my idea of athletic changed completely when seeing with my own eyes how the pro did it, marvellous ok! tak sangka lak boleh terlekat haa kt pole tu! guys mmg enjoying it without a blink..akaka)

done with that, and we were still gigih to find that digi store (psal lah susah sgt nk carikkan?!), but when that's not happening..we're off to Home Run, but we have to wait till 6pm!!! that cannot la..so, masih cube untuk gigih lagi...akhirnya, we found the digi store!! FINALLY~!! heheehe. then after create playlist of Akon+Lady Gaga..we were contemplating whether to go baseball or to finish it all to check point without completing all challenges? The latter won discussion. So, back we were to Mardi Gras @6.13pm and try to complete our last challenge, blogpost of what we've did before 7.30pm. well, we managed to do it. Thanks Yatoque!!! gigih sungguh kamu! well, the night ended at about 9.30pm with new experiences! Who would have thought this was tiring but at the same time fun!!! we're all home with Digi Limited Prepaid Internet (which was what I'm using now. the 5 days limit nk dkat habis pon..TQ digi)

I would like to thanks all my team for the efforts and fun!! Digi and Nuffnang for the chances and exprience~!! boleh buat lagi..ekeke

oh, i planned to go to frinjan after that but en habri mcm hesitant to let me go there as it was raining heavily!! siot betul..but okla as i think i have enough challenge for the day too. and my present takde lagi..menambahkan rasa malas nk pegi. :P

and off to second ocassions!! firstly, thanks to kekure for the tix. pandai ye ko tknak jumpe org tu..:p anyway, i have great fun with missfila (who-no-longer-has-a-blog). Sunday started off quite mundane too as I woke up nearly err..hehehe..and we layan-ed dvd first (which i forgot which title) and then siap tido nap segala before gerak! and worse come to worst from the we-got-ticket-or-not-hiatus to jam-packed people towards entrance, then no bottle inside stadium damn rules which make us drink 3/4 bottle. ahaks. seb baik tak terasa nk terkucil hehe..anyway thanks fila! sbb ala2 dah penat dan broadband prepaid pon mcm nk habis masa kan, aku upload gamba jek la! ;) tapi mcm gigih jek lagi broadband ku ini...jadilah marilah sambung sementara tgh upload gamba! ehehe.

masih comel ha masing2. ramaikan?

mmg ramai gile nk mampus ok org2 kat stadium tu..macam semut pon ada dah semuanya...dari yg tua ke muda, kurus dan gemok, pelbagai rupalah dan sikap kat sana..pape pon it all turns out ok! persembahan yang mantap2 dari semua contestant. saya dan fila mewakili aliyah berbesar hati untuk menyatakan sokongan kami yg hebat untuk anda. you go, girl!!

di tempat duduksaujana ha mata memandang!

huhu..gubra!!

i dont know why i always forgetting the first band, what's their name again? oh, estranged! if wasnt for andy, the drummer..confirm mmg tk igt! hiks..then, aliyah! hooray!!! pastu, hafiz kot!! :D:D oh, tertinggal misha omar.

then, bunkface (i like!!!!) i see my own gerard in sam. sorry, husband! didnt meant to cheat. ur still in my heart bebeh!! and bunkface can really rock stadium, man!! then, stacey, pastu aizat "kau pergi". well, i spend the whole song crying like mad. really miss you, kak min.


next round, hujan..the flash mob cool! tomok, you can do better lah! en black with aku rindu sayang kamu!!! memang tersangat aku rindu sayang kamu sungguh!!!! then, akim.

another round, yuna dan sebenarnya..aizat kau dan aku and last, abg faizal dgn bencinta! applause applause! semua best!!

everyone seems to beat their own beast in AJL24. overall mmg best..

eh, intro pon sgt cool tau!!! dato' siti (artis feveret jasmin ni) nyanyi "tak tahan, tak tahan tak tahannn~!" EHEHE. masa balada rasa mcm nk lari jek stadium..tp bile tang ngan en lan ex-MUH now azlan n typewriter..mmg cool habis!!! i love!!!!

dan biasalah selingan2 muzik antara zaman ni...70s groove with jeffrydin..disco with jay jay..rock kapak with search (mmg hebat) and x paham konsep apa wth MUH. but overall..OK!!

tgk live mmg best tp lepas ni, kene pastikan dpt tix VVIP baru boleh pegi..haha..kalo tk berebut la masuk entrance level 4 tu.. :D

itulah kisah hari minggu saya bersama kawan baik selamanya. sekian, terima kasih!

nota kaki: masih terkenang semasa lagu juara berkumandang dan tk puas hati bunkface tk menang jugak! :( but everything must be politically involved, how?

updates!

yes, we made it to the game. so, again..wish us luck!! going to let digi pimp our day.ehehehe

anyway, as of now..i'm having  a very bad flu symptoms which i suspected due to coldness last nite. i want to go home!

nothing to do with anything, this is lyric of "Derita Merindu" by Ahli Fiqir.

oh, such pain in love but why miss it?

Kau katakan cinta gunakan akal
Bila aku gunakan, kau yang menyangkal
Bagaimana nak kekal
Kau katakan cinta gunakan minda
Bila aku gunakan, kau yang tak percaya
Bagaimana nak bahagia

Maafmu tak bererti, kau mudah sesali
Berulang kali telah kau mungkiri
Manis mulut berjanji terpedaya lagi
Menanti biar terus didustai

Kaulah bahagia (bagiku)
Kaulah derita (bagimu)
Esok lusamu
Tak ku kenal lagi engkau siapa

Dan aku cuba sedaya upaya
Telah ku usaha dengan sepenuh jiwa
Bagaimana hendak ku lupa
bayangan wajahmu selalu di depan mata
harum baumu masih dapat ku hidu
Bagaimana ingin aku membencimu
Jikalau setiap hari merindu
Sekiranya derita merinduimu itu sebenarnya bahagia..
Aku pilih derita..

Mungkinkah esok atau lusa walau biarpun lama
Akan ku biar tiada ku tetap kan setia
Entah bila akan tiba sampai jua harimu yang sama
Esok seperti semalaman yang tak berubah

Kaulah tanda tanya.. kau tiada titik noktah
Ku dibuai mimpi lena dikejut igau semula
Kaulah tanda tanya.. kau tiada titik noktah
Ku dibuai mimpi lena dikejut igau semula

Seandainya kau berada di depan mata
Mudah untuk aku berkata-kata
Supaya dapatku melihat seraut wajahmu
Walaupun belum tentu kau mahu bertemu
Apalagi memandangku
Setelah ku turutkan segala kemahuan kau mainkan perasaan
Begitu mudah kau ucapkan terimalah saja kenyataan..
Aku masih terkilan

Maafmu tak bererti, kau mudah sesali
Berulang kali telah kau mungkiri
Manis mulut berjanji terpedaya lagi
Menanti biar terus didustai

Kaulah bahagia (bagiku)
Kaulah derita (bagimu)
Esok lusamu, tak ku kenal lagi engkau siapa
Kaulah bahagia (bagiku)
Kaulah derita (bagimu)
Esok lusamu, tak ku kenal lagi engkau siapa

Jika kau dapat memahami hati seorang perindu
Baru kau tahu derita hatiku
Jika suatu hari nanti giliran kau merindu
Baru kau ingat derita diriku
Segala yang berlaku bukan kemahuanku
Apa gunanya bahgia
Jikalau bahagia bersamamu hanyalah untuk sementara waktu
Aku pilih derita merinduimu

Maafmu tak bererti, kau mudah sesali
Berulang kali telah kau mungkiri
Manis mulut berjanji terpedaya lagi
Menanti biar terus didustai

Kaulah bahagia (bagiku)
Kaulah derita (bagimu)
Esok lusamu, tak ku kenal lagi engkau siapa
Kaulah bahagia (bagiku)
Kaulah derita (bagimu)
Esok lusamu, tak ku kenal lagi engkau siapa

2010 and wishes.

here, :: The Barbie Army :: goodlucks to us.

happy new year and more to come. it's already 4th Jan 2010. Work already started, and have a grande year, everyone!!